Femininity and the housewives

Out of all the readings we were assigned, Friedan's text from the Feminine Mystique and Sexton's poem, The Addict, impacted me the most.

As a modern woman reading Friedan, I was surprised at how these women felt their education (those who had it) was a burden because it caused them to question their lives has housewives and to want something more. I also started to question how much of their problems in the 1950-1960s were their complacency to the situation. I guess after reading about the civil rights movement and how they stood up and took control over their situation, I wanted these unhappy women to stand up and do the same. To contrast the housewives with the minorities involved in the civil rights movement, they seem to have been in a unique type of oppression. Minorities could see and know that what was happening to them was inherently wrong, however these women were living a life that they had been told was supposed to make them happy and it was where they belonged, however they could not understand or speak up about how miserable and empty it made most of them feel. They were also at conflict with themselves, it appears, because they had never been taught that it was OK to question their role as a housewife or that more was out there for them if they put away the apron and just did it.

Sexton's poem, The Addict, shows what I think was the boiling point of women in this situation needing change. Friedan mentions the tranquilizers being distributed to these unhappy women, but Sexton really puts it into the perspective of the time. She supports Friedan's notion that these women were conscious of their unhappiness but could not talk about it openly, and Sexton writes this poem from the perspective of a woman who knows these pills are killing her, "Yes I try to kill myself in small amounts, an innocuous occupation" (521). Once again emphasizes the society imposed muteness of these women so that they can acknowledge they'd sooner medicate themselves to death in dealing with their situation than speak out or change it.

I have always said that one of my desires is to, despite my career and education, take a few years after I have children to be a housewife and take care of my young family. After reading these texts I have not changed my mind about this ambition, but I can see that these women who did not get to CHOOSE that road for themselves or choose when to go back into the professional world have made it possible for me to do this. I know there is other options for women and that I can choose to go back to work and not be seen as unfeminine or a bad wife/mother. These women really paved the way and suffered silently so women today might be able to make such choices.